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Can Men and Women be Friends?

Posted on May 20, 2014 by in Society | 2 comments



These videos ┬ádebunk the myth that men and women can be friends without having any sexual feelings towards one another, at least on the man’s side. Many semi-religous Muslims like to argue that they can have friends of the opposite gender without falling into sin. They need to watch these videos with an open mind and remember that these are non-Muslims who don’t have any prohibitions regarding cross-gender relationships:


  1. So genders shouldnt mix because they could potentially fall into sin? Well the aunties arent doing a very good job at matchmaking either.

    But as a sociologist, I must question the meaning of friendship, to what extent can we, while being the human beings that god created us with our natural urges, be friends with others? Education in learning how to control ones urges, anger, drive towards sin, is more important then simply putting out one fact of information and creating a black and white image. Friendship and feelings of attraction are mutually exclusive unless one submits to their feelings and wants to pursue more. In today rapidly changing world, women and men are communicating, bonding, often seeking each others help, The goal of the Ahlulbayt a.s. was guidance towards knowledge and tools to be wise with foresight. What this post fails to do is highlight the reality we live in today and only puts forward biased videos. I do not disagree with the urge being there, but that is why one has to choose friends wisely, keep their intentions clear, and maintain moral demeanor. With facebook and other media on the rise women and men are interacting in ways these videos cant provide full information about. its not about urges online when the friendship has a mutual interest like graphic design, etc. I suggest covering all grounds and all questions from the youth regarding this topic…

    • Salaam alaykum, thank you for your insight. It seems as if the definition of friendship needs to be addressed. What we mean by friends are those who connect on an emotional level, not those who are in contact with each other for work-related or school-related purposes. Hence, nobody is stating that it is prohibited or discouraged to have those types of relationships. What is discouraged is entering into an emotionally-driven relationship where intimate feelings are disclosed with a member of the opposite gender. That being said, you are correct in stating that learning to control one’s urges is important, but not putting yourself on the brink of sin is also wise. Hence, you control your urges when you are in a work-related relationship, but you prevent yourself from coming close and putting your control to a difficult test by not entering into an intimate friendship with a member of the opposite gender. The videos are biased, I decided to put them up because they were humorous and can spark an interesting conversation about the issue – which they have succeeded in doing! Take care and may Allah reward you.

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